Have you ever been in a position where you felt misunderstood?

Or have you made assumptions that were not entirely accurate?

Having the ability to review a situation from that of others, and not just your own perspective, gives better, more informed outcomes. Richard Bandler and John Grinder – NLP founders and Judith DeLozier refer to these perspectives as Perceptual Positions.

Mastering perceptual positioning – a structured process that helps us to get a clearer picture of what happened, how other people viewed the situation and allows us to gain extra information which gives us a basis for making more effective and informed choices.

What are perceptual positions?

Often, it is useful to assess an event or outcome from several different perspectives, from:

our own perspective,

the perspective of another person, and

from the perspective of an independent observer.

The three perceptual positions are:

**First Position**

Seeing, hearing and feeling the situation through your own eyes, ears and feelings. You think in terms of what is important to you, what you want to achieve.

**Second Position**

Stepping into the shoes of the other person and experiencing (seeing, hearing and feeling) the situation as if you were them. You think in terms of how this situation would appear or be interpreted by the other person.

**Third Position**

(Camera view) standing back from a situation and experiencing it as if you were a detached observer. In your mind, you can see and hear yourself and the other person, as if you were a third person. You think in terms of what opinion, observations or advice someone would offer who is not involved.

All three positions are of equal importance, and it is useful to consciously or unconsciously cycle through these positions as we go about our daily activities.

Why you may feel stuck

Sometimes we get stuck in one of these positions:

Someone who lives his/her/their life in first position would tend to focus on his/her/their needs rather than the needs of others — a “self-focused” attitude.

Someone who lives their life primarily in second position, is always thinking about the other person at the expense of their own needs. The “people-pleaser” is often recognised here. Co-dependents or enablers in a dysfunctional or addictive situation would fit this description also.

Someone who stays in third position would be seen as rather aloof and a disinterested observer of life – always on the outside looking in.

Accountability, challenge and practice

Knowing and practicing the art of moving between these three positions assists with building rapport and your ability with influencing.

There are two more higher states of perspective consciousness; that of community and world.

Accountability

Leaders who develop a perspective that encompasses all levels can therefore increase the likelihood of their influence, connectivity and negotiation skills. You need to be in a strong resourceful state and take an objective view of your own behaviour and look for opportunities to respond differently to achieve a different and more positive outcome.

Your behaviour might unintentionally harm or negatively impact others. It's important to put yourself in their shoes and empathise with how they might feel. By shifting your perspective, you can better understand your colleagues and those around you. This approach will help you be more considerate in your interactions and think twice before speaking.

Challenge

Challenging your assumptions and perspectives can help you improve your critical thinking skills by expanding your knowledge and awareness, reducing cognitive biases and errors, enhancing creativity and innovation, increasing empathy and respect for others, and developing self-awareness and reflection. This can be done by exploring different topics, issues, or situations, generating new ideas or approaches, examining different opinions or experiences, and examining your own strengths and weaknesses.

Practice

Start by asking yourself questions that test the validity, accuracy, relevance, or completeness of your assumptions and perspectives. You should also seek feedback from people with different backgrounds and experiences. Additionally, expose yourself to diverse sources of information and perspectives, such as books, articles, and podcasts. Finally, experiment with different scenarios or solutions to test your assumptions and perspectives. By doing this, you can gain valuable insights and broaden your perspective.

We know what works

Practicing and using perceptual positioning in your workplace, during conversations, meetings and even at home can help strengthen your ability to instantly move between different positions and make informed decisions that don’t impact yourself or those around you.

Taken from Neuro-Linguistic Programming (NLP), perceptual positioning can be a powerful tool for you and your teams. With our NLP certified practitioners, we have over 30 years of experience in transforming workplace cultures, developing leaders of today and bringing the Woohoo!